British consular calls reveal typical anxieties of Brits abroad

Brits abroad, whether on holiday or as expats, often call the local consulate with some weird and wacky questions.

While there may be a ‘stock’ image of the quintessential Brit abroad that most people have in their minds, anybody who has ever set foot in Spain, either as a holidaymaker or an expat, will know full well that Brits in Spain come in all types…

Ranging in age, orientation, class, wealth and general outlook, the sizeable expat community of Spain is a tiny snapshot of Britan as a whole – diverse, open-minded, adventurous and cut through with a great sense of self-deprecating humour.

It is reassuring, however, to be reminded that a Brit abroad can still be something of a fish out of water, no matter how well integrated they are. And recent information revealed by the Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) show the types of anxieties that some Brits are prone to when they move overseas.

The FCO data published last week tells the tale of some of the more ‘bizarre’ calls received at British consulates around the world. One standout is the poor chap enquiring where he could find decent bacon in his new adopted country, while a woman living in Lebanon called the local consulate to ask how to get hold of an English butler.

In Spain, one concerned caller rang the consulate in Málaga to ask why some Spaniards at the beach near him appeared to be nudists, not having realised that he had strayed on to a nudist beach.

In Russia, a British woman also got in touch with the local consular services to express her disappointment that the Embassy had not laid on a guided tour of the city when she first arrived in St Petersburg.

“Our consular staff are a helpful bunch and do an amazing job helping out Brits in trouble around the world,” said Foreign Minister James Duddridge. “But it is important that people remember they are there to help with genuine emergencies and not as an alternative to directory inquiries.

“Every minute they spend handling a call requesting advice on butlers or nudists is time taken away from dealing with life and death cases, so I urge the public to think before picking up the phone.”

With wrists duly slapped, Brits abroad should remember that certain locations – Spain’s Costa del Sol in particular – has a ready-made network of expats who can help with most enquiries, while things such as getting hold of decent bacon is a no-brainer: the region is awash with Brit-friendly stores, bars, restaurants and shops to make you feel right at home, right away.