Málaga CF – the last remaining English football team in the Champions League… sort of

The Guiri Army bring a bit of Brit support to Málaga CF

Despite being the most popular sport in the world by some distance, football can still split a room down the middle. Perhaps that’s its strength. But regardless of the tactics, the circus, the cheating and the bleating, as a vehicle for drama and tales of the unexpected, football is untouchable.

So it’s little wonder that life for British expats on the Costa del Sol should be coloured in some way by the Beautiful Game. As seasons come to a close all over Europe, the continent’s foremost competition – the Champions League – is coming into its own…

Now we all know the drill here. As Europe’s last remaining eight teams battle it out, all the usual suspects rise to the top. There’s Barcelona and Real Madrid of course, the mighty Germans of Bayern Munich and the Beckham-endorsed artistes from France, Paris Saint Germain. And then you look to England and… nothing.

For the first time in 17 years there are no English clubs in the last eight. Despite the millions and billions available to Manchester United, Manchester City, Chelsea and Arsenal, they’ve all been dumped out early and unceremoniously this year. That’s a story in itself. But there’s a more interesting one brewing down on the sunny shores of southern Spain.

Because in fact, there is one English-backed team remaining in the last eight of the Champions League. They have no English players, no English roots and are routinely baffled by their affiliation with anything Inglés. But they are Málaga CF – fifth in La Liga, Spain’s third remaining representative in the Champions League… and a club where 10 per cent of the fanbase is British.

As the largest team in a region that is home to hundreds of thousands of British expats, perhaps it is understandable that Málaga has attracted such a fervent foreign following. But football fans are notoriously fickle, tribal and irrational. Surely, if they like football and live on the Costa del Sol, they have their own team to follow? Those sunburnt West Ham tattoos aren’t there for fashion reasons, are they?

Well, the Wall Street Journal (WSJ) – oddly – has taken up the baton, following members of Málaga’s self-titled ‘Guiri Army’ as they embarked on the latest round of Champions League fixtures.

“They can’t get their heads around seeing us, and hearing us speaking English,” Graham Rimmer of the Guiri Army told the WSJ. “They love us. But basically they think we’re nut cases.”

Actually, the Guiri Army, and their compatriots the Peña Internacional Malaguista, are merely following the well-worn path taken by millions of holidaymakers and homeowners who have set up shop on the Costa del Sol. They have realised that life is better in the sunshine, and decided that nowhere offers the combination of accessibility, culture, warmth and home comforts quite so well as the Costa del Sol.

Football is an important facet of life for millions of Brits. To know that a move to Spain doesn’t have to mean foregoing the weekly ritual of fandom and live football with a few beers with friends thrown in is surely music to the ears of many.

So if you’re contemplating a move to Spain but can’t face the idea of missing your football fix, why not give the Guiri Army a call? They would be delighted to welcome you into their barmy brood.